CISSP, MSCE, SSCP, CISM, A+, CCIEAEAKEAGAGEAGFUCK!#%!#%#!

Here's a pretty good reason why certifications don't par up with experience. The only time I've seen certifications come into question is when either two cases: 1) you're looking for a new job and in that case that the certifications is the equivalent of having a Bachelor's degree ( yes a simple check box will suffice) or 2) you're an external consultant trying to prove to executives why paying you $500/hour when the executive is too fucking stupid to realize there's plenty of people within his organization who know whats wrong already if they'd ever perk up from the stock portfolio or upcoming golf match. Bitter? You better fucking believe it.